Goodbye overlooked middle child.

So this boy is off to college this Saturday.


To Oakland University.

On scholarship.

I am not a parent that advertises my kids’ accomplishments on my car bumper.

Besides, it’s hard to find a bumper stick that reads, My son may not be an honor student but at least he hasn’t gotten anyone pregnant. 

In general I spend a lot of time writing about the foolish things they do because let’s face it, the material is easy to come by.

But I am taking a pause from my normal fodder to give a serious shout out to Gabe, our middle son, because he has worked hard and is deserving of the praise.  And trust me, in this house, praise does not come easily.

We generally prefer to beat each other over the head with our shortcomings – it builds character.

Plus, it’s not easy being the middle child in this family.

Especially when you are tasked with carrying the bulk of the family dreams into the next generation.

That statement may sound like hyperbole but let me recount a dinner table conversation I had with Gabe and his younger brother Cole about a year and a half ago.

This conversation took place at time when Gabe had decided that college was no longer worth his time – this decision coming as his oldest brother was busy turning a year’s worth of student loans into the most expensive game of League of Legends EVER. 

Gabe:  I’m not going to college.  Who says you have to go to college?

Me:  Gabe, if you don’t go to college, then Cole is the only hope for Dad and me.

Cole: You guys are screwed.

So you can see why we pinned our hopes back on Gabe.

Surely his desire to break free from our dysfunction would override his hipster-minded protestations and allow him to pursue his higher education opportunities.

To ensure a change of heart, we set about making his home life as miserable as possible for the next 18 months.

And, YAY to our awesome parenting skills (we do misery better than most), it worked.

Suddenly college life seemed so much more appealing.

And now he’s off.

And we are thrilled.  And proud beyond words.

So Gabriel Patrick Jamison – I’m talking to you now – pay attention.

Hit the road jack and don’t you come back.  Except for visits and to leave cash.


And good luck, we’re all counting on you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s