• Didn’t you people learn anything from Lord of the Flies?

    So two guys who just love the Constitution and their own interpretation of the 2nd Amendment wrote a children’s book promoting the open-carry of firearms. This illustrated book follows the adventures of Brenna – a “typical 13-year old” – whose parents just happen to open carry firearms for “self-defense” while they are out and about… Continue Reading

  • No chance in hell.

    Or how finding out you might have a brain bleed and a baby on the way causes you to finally throw away your tattered underwear. Jean Paul Sartre said that life begins on the other side of despair.  Obviously Mr. Sartre had never spent much time in a modern emergency room.  He would have found… Continue Reading

  • Tea with Mr. Tumnus.

    A friend recently sent out a Facebook request asking for a new fantasy series to read – she had just completed The Hunger Games trilogy and was looking for suggestions.  It should be noted that this friend is significantly younger than me – significant meaning the world into which she was born has always had… Continue Reading

  • Blame Fruit of the Loom for the continued immigration debate.

    As the great-granddaughter of immigrants, I was going to write about immigration policy and the responsibilities borne by any first world nation in regards to escalating violence in developing nations and sheltering displaced children seeking refuge but I have much more pressing problems right here at home. My underwear is ripped. And I should probably throw… Continue Reading

  • The weight of whatever.

    Anything or everything does not fit in this context – packed tight as it is already with no matter what. Regardless, and in any case – it would appear inconsequential. There is no decision to be made on an alternative. In any event. Whatever happens. We take it or leave it.

  • Period piece.

    I started my period roughly at age thirteen.  Which means my uterus has been shedding its lining once a month or so for the last 29 years. Not including the roughly 27 months I spent in various states of gestation or the last five months where my menopausal uterus seems decidedly less cooperative. That may… Continue Reading

  • Things my mom did.

    She… Saved money by cutting my and my sister’s hair at home. Not that you could ever tell. Smashed ice in a dishtowel and poured orange juice on top to simulate a snow cone when my sister and I would beg to buy one from the ice cream man. Made us go to bed at… Continue Reading

  • Glass houses.

    Foolishly consistent are the hobgoblins of my little mind; no matter over which rests an unturned stone; mind the broken glass. Laurels are conspicuous by their absence yet no fonder grows my heart; I am no fair maiden to be won so easily by faint praise. Damn.    

  • Truth be told.

    I hate drama. I don’t like drawing attention to myself. I understand your point. I am only being honest. I don’t mean to be rude. I’m starving. I’m broke. I’m undecided. I’m sorry. I was just going to call you. I wish we lived closer. I’m here if you need me. I didn’t mean that… Continue Reading

  • Mother of all possibilities.

    I had this picture in my head of the mother that I would be before my first son was born. It looked kind of like this. But, you know, with a baby instead of a joint. Now granted – with the exception of small breast size – nothing in this photograph would remind anyone of… Continue Reading